So, I’m a big baby sometimes. And since before the holidays, I’ve needed to upgrade my WordPress blog to the newest version. I finally got myself together today and did it. And guess what? It was really quite easy. Such fuss over nothing!
Well, hold on now, I had fears, real fears, that if they had proven true would have been very devastating to my blog. Thankfully, though, the sky remained in-tact and all is well (so far). So, I thought I’d address something today that I’m currently struggling with, namely, when do you upgrade your technology?
Upgrading your technology is scary for several reasons, but the most profound in my opinion is fear of loss. Losing control, losing a file, picture, etc. to the great abyss of the digital netherworld. And here is the simple solution: don’t care so much and you will either:
a. be fine or
b. lose everything or
c. lose some stuff
So, as you can see, logically speaking, you’re liable to lose some things, maybe all of them, but you are also likely to gain the use of your new upgrade and blissfully return to your explorations. No harm no foul. So, why get all worked up over possible nothing? Amygdala. Yes, I said it. Amygdala. The “animal brain” as it is known. This part of your brain tells you two things: fight or flee. No, “hi, let’s talk.” It’s either “them’s fightin’ words!” or “run!”
So, to combat this obnoxious brain reaction to new stuff, like technology, find a helper to walk you through the change you need to make.
A friend of mine just happened to be on Twitter and asked: “anyone need help?” And so I said, “yes!” And he helped reassure me, and I was back on track.
Isn’t it funny sometimes how all we need is a little reassurance once in awhile to help us get through tough changes (or when you’re particularly needy like I was feeling)?
What are you putting off upgrading? What are you going to do about it…you big baby?! ;-P
It has been 15 days since my last post. That’s half a month.
Wow, does that make me a loser? Let’s find out.
I could easily make excuses about not writing. Writing is hard work. It takes consistency. It takes effort to write, especially when you don’t feel like it. Sometimes because you’re not inspired, sometimes because you’re not focused. I’m prone to both inspiration running dry and losing focus; but I don’t think that is the worst problem I, or others I know, have. No, I think the issue is very different, and needs a different way to solve it.
So, what is really going on? Well, here are some things that standout to me:
When I don’t want to do something, I usually don’t.
That’s a real problem. Life requires you to act, whether you want to or not.
Example: I don’t want to work on my class essay or my term paper, but I must, or I fail and that will hurt my bottom line (can you say ‘financial aid repayment?’) – and my pride.
I get fear of rejection … easily.
That’s a problem because I need to be brave if I’m going to write. I have to stick my neck out there and say what I think.
Example: I’m furious about the shooting at Fort Hood. I want everyone to wake up. Violence is part of life, but, once again, there were warning signs. Signs that were not taken seriously and now people are dead. Some of you won’t like my bluntness, but that’s too bad. The world is not a politically correct place.
Procrastination.
What a dreadful word. It conjures only negative feelings. But, that is just the problem, feelings. Sometimes you just need to push past your feelings and bite the bullet. Or, ‘eat the frog,’ as motivational speaker Brian Tracy says in his book Eat That Frog!
Example: Well, yes, the essay and term paper fit here, but there’s more. I’ve put off fixing my personal finances – and time is running out to get it fixed. I have to eat the frog. Get it done. Or else.
So, where does that leave us? What are we supposed to do when we don’t want to take action, due to fear? We push ahead. We work through the issue, bite, by disgusting bite, of frog.
But, is that all there is to the problem?
Not by a long-shot. Actually, there is a much deeper problem. We feel the need to do something to make us feel worthy. We really believe that we’re only worth something if we’re doing something.
I think I heard it best in a movie (which I can’t remember off the top of my head right now… and am too lazy to look up… I know, I know): ”We’re human beings, not human doings.”
It’s very true. We are valuable not for what we do, but for our very existence. Some of you don’t believe me. That’s OK. You’re not supposed to. You’re supposed to figure it out for yourself. You can’t be told by someone else that you’re valuable; you have to come to believe it yourself.
Now, some people go too far. They think they are ‘God’s gift to the world.’ And yes, to an extent that is true, just not in the way they think they are. You do exist because you were created to exist, but why you’re here is a mystery. However, despite that mystery, you can be certain that you are valuable just by virtue of existing.
So, what does all this philosophical mumbo-jumbo have to do with our original problem of feeling like a loser for not working on what you know you’re supposed to? That’s simple. “You can do, or not do, but it is the try that counts. ” (Sorry Yoda, you were wrong…in this instance… just this once, ok?) Human beings were never meant to be robots; otherwise we would all be robots. We are meant to fumble around, like losers, and then find the solution.
So, the next time you start to beat yourself up about stuff you know you’re supposed to be doing, just stop. Smile. And then go on trying, in your silly little way, to do what you can and leave the rest.
Take time to enjoy just being you.
Fix a cup of tea. Watch some Hulu. Write your blog post. Write your essay. Clean your bathroom. You’ll live better knowing there is not so much pressure on you as you might have thought before you started reading this post. And, you’ll probably actually get more done too.