photo by antigallery
It has been 15 days since my last post. That’s half a month.
Wow, does that make me a loser? Let’s find out.
I could easily make excuses about not writing. Writing is hard work. It takes consistency. It takes effort to write, especially when you don’t feel like it. Sometimes because you’re not inspired, sometimes because you’re not focused. I’m prone to both inspiration running dry and losing focus; but I don’t think that is the worst problem I, or others I know, have. No, I think the issue is very different, and needs a different way to solve it.
So, what is really going on? Well, here are some things that standout to me:
When I don’t want to do something, I usually don’t.
That’s a real problem. Life requires you to act, whether you want to or not.
- Example: I don’t want to work on my class essay or my term paper, but I must, or I fail and that will hurt my bottom line (can you say ‘financial aid repayment?’) – and my pride.
I get fear of rejection … easily.
That’s a problem because I need to be brave if I’m going to write. I have to stick my neck out there and say what I think.
- Example: I’m furious about the shooting at Fort Hood. I want everyone to wake up. Violence is part of life, but, once again, there were warning signs. Signs that were not taken seriously and now people are dead. Some of you won’t like my bluntness, but that’s too bad. The world is not a politically correct place.
Procrastination.
What a dreadful word. It conjures only negative feelings. But, that is just the problem, feelings. Sometimes you just need to push past your feelings and bite the bullet. Or, ‘eat the frog,’ as motivational speaker Brian Tracy says in his book Eat That Frog!
- Example: Well, yes, the essay and term paper fit here, but there’s more. I’ve put off fixing my personal finances – and time is running out to get it fixed. I have to eat the frog. Get it done. Or else.
So, where does that leave us? What are we supposed to do when we don’t want to take action, due to fear? We push ahead. We work through the issue, bite, by disgusting bite, of frog.
But, is that all there is to the problem?
Not by a long-shot. Actually, there is a much deeper problem. We feel the need to do something to make us feel worthy. We really believe that we’re only worth something if we’re doing something.
I think I heard it best in a movie (which I can’t remember off the top of my head right now… and am too lazy to look up… I know, I know): ”We’re human beings, not human doings.”
It’s very true. We are valuable not for what we do, but for our very existence. Some of you don’t believe me. That’s OK. You’re not supposed to. You’re supposed to figure it out for yourself. You can’t be told by someone else that you’re valuable; you have to come to believe it yourself.
Now, some people go too far. They think they are ‘God’s gift to the world.’ And yes, to an extent that is true, just not in the way they think they are. You do exist because you were created to exist, but why you’re here is a mystery. However, despite that mystery, you can be certain that you are valuable just by virtue of existing.
So, what does all this philosophical mumbo-jumbo have to do with our original problem of feeling like a loser for not working on what you know you’re supposed to? That’s simple. “You can do, or not do, but it is the try that counts. ” (Sorry Yoda, you were wrong…in this instance… just this once, ok?) Human beings were never meant to be robots; otherwise we would all be robots. We are meant to fumble around, like losers, and then find the solution.
So, the next time you start to beat yourself up about stuff you know you’re supposed to be doing, just stop. Smile. And then go on trying, in your silly little way, to do what you can and leave the rest.
Take time to enjoy just being you.
Fix a cup of tea. Watch some Hulu. Write your blog post. Write your essay. Clean your bathroom. You’ll live better knowing there is not so much pressure on you as you might have thought before you started reading this post. And, you’ll probably actually get more done too.
Until next time.
Peace.
-Ryan.
